if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
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