but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
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Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
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I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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