I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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