Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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