Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
