She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
What happened to fro yo and sex?
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
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