we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dignity is for republicans.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
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