1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
What did we do last night that was yellow?
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Randomize
