so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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