wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
I know her cup size but not her name....
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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