You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.