do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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