If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.