Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Randomize
