I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
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