walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize