It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
