Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Randomize