You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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