shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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