I'm really into asian looking animals
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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