people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize