You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
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I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
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I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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