Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die