This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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