Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
