You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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