Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Randomize
