is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
It was confusing and full of hummus
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Randomize
