I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize