Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
This house was built for laser tag.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Randomize
