and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
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The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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