Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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