Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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