Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
