Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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