Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face