yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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