absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
