**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Small penises have feelings too.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend