I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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