physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Randomize
