i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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