i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
im six kinds of drunk right now
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Randomize