The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize