i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
