Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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