Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
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