Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
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Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
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I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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