You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
